Still can't believe this film is even real.
| “ | I'M GONNA CUSHION OUR FALL WITH THIS WATER BUCKET, RELEASE!!!!!! | „ |
| ~ This one's my favourite lmao |
Was this movie bad? Yes. Was it the best thing I've ever watched? Also yes.
What's the Work?
A Minecraft Movie is a film by Warner Brothers, Legendary Pictures and Mojang Studios. It follows Steve and a gang of Misfits on their journey through the Overworld. They'd discover new skills and resources to help them complete the Orb of Dominance to return home. When Malgosha and her Piglin army got their grubby hands on the Orb, the heroes put their creativity to the test in order to overcome the invasive threat.
Who is He? What has He Done?
| “ | As a child, I yearned for the mines... But something always got in the way. But the call of the mines was too strong. So one day, I started digging...and digging...until I found...this. A wonderland where anything you can imagine is possible. As long as what you imagine...can be built out of blocks. | „ |
| ~ Steve's origin. |
Steve was formerly a doorknob salesman who had always longed for adventure and creativity, but never gotten a chance to pursue this passion. It wasn't until he revisited the mines, a place he had always yearned for, where he found an Earth Crystal and the mysterious Orb of Dominance. After combining the two artifacts, it opened a portal to a place unlike any other: the Overworld.
He found a world of blocks and infinite possibilities, a perfect sandbox for his ambitions. Years were spent building a wonderland, befriending the local village, and mastering the new tools at his disposal. With his tamed wolf named Dennis, Steve had never felt more at home. All seemed to be perfect, until one day, he and his furry friend stumbled across a strange obsidian structure; ruined from time and waiting to be reconstructed. Thinking this was another opportunity for adventure, Steve completed the obsidian frame before giving the FLINT AND STEEL a single flick. Just like that, a portal between dimensions opened, and what awaited him on the other side was... THE NETHER - a hellish realm and home of the Piglins, but more concerningly to Steve, a place of no creativity. The Piglins captured the duo and brought them to Malgosha, their ruthless queen. She demanded the Orb of Dominance, but thanks to Steve's quick thinking, Dennis escaped with the artifact and closed the portal along the way.
Unfortunately, Steve had to trap himself in the Nether for his best friend to flee. He had instructed Dennis to hide the Orb in the real world so the Piglins can never get their grubby hands on it. Years were spent rotting in the Piglins' dungeon, until he heard that the Orb of Dominance had been rediscovered by a group of misfits, which made Malgosha blackmail him into retrieving the Orb, threatening Dennis's life if he dares to fail. Reluctantly accepting this, Steve returned to the Overworld and climbed up a wooden tower, where he saved Henry, Garret, Natalie, and Dawn from getting devoured by the zombies. There, Steve and the Misfits introduce themselves to each other.
It is revealed that the Earth Crystal had shattered last night, deactivating the Orb of Dominance and closing off the portal to the real world. Thankfully, Steve knew the Woodland Mansion had an extra, so he brought the Misfits to his home, Midport Village, to prepare for the adventure. He presented his stash of gears and artifacts to the newbies, showing them that creativity was the strongest weapon in this world. Suddenly, the village was ambushed by the Piglins, splitting off Steve, Henry, and Garret from the rest of the team. With ELYTRA WING SUITS, the trio had successfully fled the Piglins. After navigating through the mines, they made it to the Woodland Mansion, where Steve and Garret made a distraction for the Illagers, giving Henry an opportunity to sneak around and find the replacement Earth Crystal. It wasn't long before the Illagers caught onto this act and tied up the two humans in a ring. A crate lowered, revealing the dreaded -
| “ | Chicken Jockey! | „ |
| ~ Cinema employees' worst nightmare. |
Fortunately, Steve freed himself and knocked down the baby zombie before it could defeat Garret. Henry made an unexpected entrance by falling through a few floors, but he came with a brand new Earth Crystal. Artifact in hand, the trio fled the Woodland Mansion, but they were quickly confronted by Malgosha, who snagged the Orb of Dominance and left a bunch of Piglins with TNT to finish off the heroes. Thanks to Garrets quick thinking, Steve and Henry made an explosive escape, but they were knocked out in the process. Just as they woke up in Natalie and Dawn's new base, Malgosha started her invasion. As Piglin forces poured into the Overworld, the heroes prepared defences while Steve got in his DIAMOND ARMOR, FULL SET! When the battle began, he personally faced Malgosha and challenged her to a duel. The Piglins were overpowered, their Nether Portal shut down, and Steve defeated the evil sorceress. In the ending, he ultimately chose to leave the Overworld and return to Earth.
Admirable Standard
Easily the most admirable character in the movie. His greatest act is trapping himself in the Nether for Dennis's safety and to ensure the Piglins never get the Orb again. Besides that, he used his Overworld expertise to save the misfits from zombies, lead them to the Woodland Mansion, cushion a lethal fall, and physically defeat Malgosha in the end. Whatever the other heroes accomplish, it's always thanks to his guidance. If it wasn't for him, the misfits wouldn't have even survived their first night - allowing the Piglins to retrieve the Orb of Dominance and destroy the Overworld.
Midigating Factors
Steve's a pretty chill guy overall, but there are still some things worth pointing out.
- Jerkish moments: He and Garret decided to detour from the Woodland Mansion to go to his stash of diamonds instead. As mentioned by Henry, this was bad idea since they put Natalie and Dawn in danger by taking that detour. However, Steve was hesitant the whole time - apologizing to an upset Henry and calling out Garret after they barely made it out alive. It was all Garret's fault anyway, who forced Steve into the deal by putting the Orb of Dominance on the line.
- Lethality: He killed a few hostile mobs, but these are all justified as self-defence. They were mostly mindless monsters, anyway.
What Prevents Him from Being Pure Good?
This was NOT how 10 year-old me imagined a Minecraft movie
At the beginning of the movie, he snuck past the old miner to enter the mineshaft. Although he claims it's because the "call of the mines was too strong"... trespassing is still trespassing. It's still breaking the law for no reason other than personal desires. Yeah, this is a pretty dumb prevention, but I don't see any way around it, either. He also has one unsubverted jerkish moment: gleefully "piloting" Garret during the Ghast chase by pulling on his hair, despite knowing the latter was against it. Garret literally started sobbing, which Steve ignored.
Final Verdict
Easy yes for he... is Steve.